Mary, I love you.

But you sent me an email entitled: SHARKS WITH HUMAN TEETH

No I did not open that shit! Granted, I'm pretty happy you decided to be straight forward about the contents of said email, unlike some friends I know . . . looking at you ARIC!

Oh yes, I got your badass Christmas card while I was dying from the flu this week. Charlie and I both enjoyed it:



But what I enjoyed most about it was the fact that instead of "Regards" like most losers, you spiced things up with this:


AMAZING! Love you forever!!! That straight up made me laugh for a good 15 minutes and then sent me into a 30 minute coughing fit. Kudos you!